ACRA

09-11-10 KOLKATA - ACRA

And so i got up irritated at 5 in the morning and waited for my pickup which was supposed to be at 6. But i didn't get any kind sign of my pickup. A call at 6.20, that my pickup has arrived. Then the usual pickups. Acra, 90 minutes drive from my place, and i was dozing on my way. The location was kind of interior. And we have go a five minute drive from the main road which leads into small medium and large bumps of mud road. The location was like a pakka village. And the place that we were supposed to shoot was on the banks of RIVER HOOGLY. WOW ! You would not belive how long and wide it is. And we had to get down into the wet muds and we had a chance of messing up our legs with wet and slippery mud. The the best part of today was i was 4 huge cargo ships that crossed us. It was so huge and close to us. And those ships were really fast. The place where we shot was completely under water by 3 pm. This is the time that i was water rise and water drain. The location was beautiful and we had a chance to shoot the sunset. I LOVED MY DAY

SNATCH

There are two types of balls:

There are big brave balls, and there are little faggot balls.

Dicks have drive and clarity of vision but they're not clever.

They smell pussy and they want a piece of the action.

And you thought you smelled some good old pussy

and have brought your two little faggot balls along

for a good old time.

you're having second thoughts.

You're shrinking.

And your two little balls are shrinking with you.

The fact that you've got "Replica" written on the side of your gun

and the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle written on the side of mine

should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence.

Now fuck off.

Ask a person how they have been ???

I ve come across many people or may be only a few or none !! If so i ve come across, when i ask them "HOW YOU BEEN?" the majority of their replies - "OK, NOT BAD, LIFE SUCKS, TERRIBLE PLEASE DON'T ASK AND ONE VERY RARELY SAYS LIFE IS PERFECT". After wondering for a long time why people say life is sad .. i found out this .. How many of us have been really happy? At least once in a day we will be happy the only thing is WE THINK A LOT ABOUT OUR WORRIES AND WE DON'T THINK A LOT OF OUR HAPPINESS. So the only thing we think is only about our worries so life sucks !! We don't think of our happiness, happiness just comes and passes by.. but worries, we wont let it pass by we sit aside with it and keep cribbing about it.

What i ve learnt is AM GONNA TAKE MY SADNESS AS EQUAL AS HAPPINESS OR AM GONNA TAKE MY HAPPINESS AS EQUAL AS MY SADNESS so in both the ways it compromises. So anyways both the emotions are going to be equal and am going to think about HAPPINESS as much as i have thought of my worries!!

!!A NEW LIFE A NEW START!!

AM I A BASTARD?

I don't know why am i like this... i hate myself.. i don't know what i've done... what more i will do.... everyone hates me for me being like this.. i want to run away as far as possible .. as fast as possible.. run away from everything... i want to go back into my shell... its what i want now... rite now... i wasted my life... its all over but i have a strong feeling i can bring it back... i can bring back what i always wanted.. if i word hard.....

I hate people who play music.. its not hate.. i get on my nerves... i always wanted to play music,,, be a part of music... i ve had the oppourtunities to learn but i never... now i really want to learn for the past year and a half its in my heart but now am quite busy with other work..... i feel i wasnt respected .... i was jus like one among the photographers who is clikcing.... i hate my self....i wanna get all the attention or else get out from there.... when will i really learn... the pain is too much..

Why dont even my close people understand this.............

I FEEL AS IF AM A BASTARD

The Reason Why Am Here.....

Without no reason no one is born. It really took me a lot of years to understand the meaning of life, am still searching for one final answer which would stop my search. As far as now right this moment am here to make people happy.

It has happened to me a lot of times and am happy. Most of the people whom i make happy are girls, have no reason why i haven't made a single male happy. Made a lot of girls happy, they say it to me, they like me because i make them laugh and make them happy.

This is the same story which happens to me always - Some girl who is in search of happiness would come into my life, then we talk a lot, talk a lot, talk a lot, I make her happy, happy & happy, then I make her to forget about her worries and at one stage there will be only happiness where there will be no looking back at her past and cribbing about it.. at that stage she goes into the world all by herself... Am so happy that i have actually guided a few into the life of happiness.

...........................IF THEY ARE HAPPY I AM HAPPY......................... Still i haven't found what i want but i like what i have and what am doing........... am happy........



Life laughs at you when your SAD,
Life smiles at you when your HAPPY, but
Life salutes you when you make others HAPPY - Charlie Chaplin.

What must i do......

Nothing was so sure in my life. I did everything and tried anything. Nothing really happened until i joined college. I was going in my way, 24*7 photography. Learn as quickly as possible. Someone from some where came into my life and i started to learn the motion photography (CINEMATOGRAPHY) from him (GEORGE). Dec 26th he asked me to make my portfolio ready and on 26th i got a call and i went an hour late to meet Mr. Arjun Jena, cinematographer of AEGAN. I got all wet completely wet when i reached him. He made me to wait for an hour. I had a little knowledge on the cinema world. He came had a look at my photographs. And asked me what's D.O.F and I.S.O which i answered and later asked whats lattitude for which said nope i dont know sir but i will learn (i wanted to be strong like will smith in the movie pursuit of happyness). He asked me to leave and said he will give me a call...... Jan 1.... got a call from him saying tomorrow is the photo shoot and asked me to come...... It started there.... with no technical knowledge i joined him as his assist.... the first work i did at photoshoot was tears newspapers so it can be kept as markers for a refrence book...... the first work i did in the shoot was cover an entire balcony with black cloth.... the first thing i spoke with Ajith - Doing my B.sc Visual communication and am studying and working.... the last thing i did for this film was yesterday 9\10\08 went to my office and collected audio sond cd..... From nothing when i joined and to something rite now i ve learnt something and am always thankful to GEORGE and to my cinematographer Mr. Arjun Jena

Replacement Happniess

I was not born happy in this world.... yes like all babies do i cried during my birth... why do babies cry when they are born???? they knew the world out is bad and not welcoming you so you cry you wont want to be exposed or simple come out of the shell.... so now i think way back... when was i happy????? hmmmm....on my 5th birthday not sure when.... my dad got me a red teddy bear... he came climbing up the stairs and i saw him from balcony and i ran and i hugged him.... i still remember that... it's registered in my mind ... i have the feel as if it happens in most of the movies... Dad got me everything and anything i wanted... point my at anything and i got it..... but mom was not like that.... why???

It's really a funny one.... Pls dont laugh... my mom and a few of her friends and thier kids we all went to naidu hall for shopping... this was also waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back.... and i cried for something .... i really liked it... and i know almost every kids in the town has that.... any guesses??????? I CRIED FOR A BARBIE DOLL !! LOLZ.......... see that time i cried and now am laughing my ass out... REPLACEMENT HAPPINESS............... We got a PC in 1998 itself... cool rite???? and when i was in 6th ma dad got me a cricket kit for 1200 bucks .... for me it was waaaaaaaaaay big money.... i said... "Pa thanks...."and later... life was fucked up..... i was soooooooo good at studies that i (many ppl aint know this ) flunked in a 7th.... so life was hard.... so how cleared ma 10th (86%) and changed school 11th.... fell in love ... not really... but that time i called it as pure love..... funny rite..... so again... studies was bad... cleared 12th with dignity had a big fight with my principal and me... so i call it DIGNITY(59%)........ then college.... agains gals... gals ... gals.....

( and on 31/08/2006 i got my firstcamera NIKON FM2..........exactally two years later 31/08/2008 i got NIKON D80...................)



I call gals as replaement happiness..... but onething is clear..... all gal frnds of mine give me happiness but they actually dont replace .... i only mean the happiness they give me is replaced by one and another..... each one is different and i cant forget them in my life........


I meet a gal then she departs... sad for some time.... then another gal .... she departs.... then another..... LIFE KEEPS GOING........................ so are really gals my happiness.......

FAMILY................GEORGE..... ARJUN JI.......THE WORK I DO..............FRIENDS........................


life is a cycle you get happiness and the very next day sad........ BALANCED .... nature's trick.....